Surrendering the Stars...or Lack Of

Surrendering Fear of Man and their Opinions

Hey! I’m so happy to meet you. I’m Julie Arduini, Are-due-we-knee, and when I’m not chasing Milo, my reactive rescue beagle mix, or watching crime shows, I write small-town romances with Christian surrender themes and chocolate mentions.

Wait! Don’t go! Stick with me.

Don’t let the Christian word scare you.

I’m not religious. I am full of faith and M&M’s. And I think my posts regarding surrender issues here on Substack will encourage and entertain you. My romance books have a natural progression of faith to them, but my Beta readers don’t find me or my writing preachy.

I am authentic. I am a hot mess that will be the first to admit if I’m the one that passed gas. I’m most likely to speak up if a meeting has gone on too long or in my opinion wasted my time.

I’ve learned through my 54 years that the key to a successful life is through a little word called surrender. I’ve realized there were good things I’ve had to let go of. Why? Because better things were ahead. I had to walk away from bad choices—-my own, and others. And then there’s the chocolate part.

I used to be the one you’d find downing M&M’s for breakfast. I would eat chocolate all day. I’ve had to change that up a bit as I’ve aged, but because we can relate to the struggle, my tagline is:

Encouraging you to surrender the good, the bad, and—-maybe one day—-the chocolate.

Friends, that’s what this space is about. Some posts will be serious, others on the silly side. All posts will be a surrender issue, and of course, a chocolate mention.

I thought I would start with what kept me from pursuing writing until I was 35 years old.

Fear of man.

I grew up with sub-par English teachers who didn’t teach a lot on grammar. I can create a character-driven story that will make readers cry, but my technical side? Not great.

As the stories in my head begged to be put on word processor and then laptop, I pushed aside every thought about becoming an author. Even though there were some romance books out back in the day that I’d read and I knew, knew I could do better.

But I didn’t want anyone to discover I wasn’t great at grammar, and I certainly didn’t think I would survive one-star reviews. That kept me writing safe things like newsletters for my local Mothers of Preschoolers, MOPS, chapter.

One morning I was at church and the message was about laying down your Isaac. It’s a story from the Old Testament where God asked Abraham to take his son, the son he never thought he’d have with Sarah, and was pretty old when it came to pass, on a journey where he would have to sacrifice him as an offering to God.

It’s a crazy story. But here’s the thing. Abraham had no idea why God was asking him to do this, but because He had been so faithful, Abraham obeyed. And when the time came for the big chop, he was stopped. There was a lamb, and instead of Issac, the lamb became the offering instead.

Laying stuff down that you care about is hard. For me that morning, I knew it was time to let go of the newsletter. It was easy, it was informative, but it was time to pass it on and start something new. I had no idea what that something was. Like Abraham, I had to move forward with no idea what the destination was.

For movie fans, I guess Indiana Jones had something similar, when he had to jump off a cliff with no idea how he’d survive. It was only after he jumped did a landing appear. I could be wrong about details, I can’t take those movies. I hate, hate, hate snakes in every possible form (won’t be surrendering that hate today) so those movies are a no from me.

Anyway, saying yes to God and writing for Him was scary because I knew there was a good chance I’d seek publication. Strangers reading my work. Leaving reviews. I was terrified. To me, those reviews were what people thought of me, and my self-esteem was low enough. Once I surrendered the fear, I realized reviews were a look at my books, not me.

The journey was swift, honestly. I joined Flash Fiction challenges and one of my entries caught the eye of an editor creating an anthology. In less than a year of that surrender I had my first publishing credit and was invited to a book signing as a contributing author. Crazy!

After that a small publishing company took me on and it was ten years ago this November my first romance was published. The reviews have been positive. I can’t remember which book received the lower reviews, but I remember what they said. It wasn’t their cup of tea. The worst part of all was they hit purchase twice, so they were stuck with two copies.

Years ago that would have sent me to bed in a depression. No lie. But this review, even with a lack of stars, was kind. And I even laughed about the double purchase not because I was making fun of the person, but I survived the rejection. It wasn’t personal.

I now have ten books under my belt, and I’m now my own publisher with Surrendered Scribe Media. My current series is Surrendering Hearts. The Hart sextuplets discover their own identity while trying to find a love like their parents shared. I feel this is the series where I’ve grown up as a writer. The feedback has been amazing.

So there you have it. Maybe writing isn’t your thing and you have no desire to get published. But I bet there is something in your life that makes you wonder what others think. If you have a job, chances are you have an annual review. The anticipation on those can be brutal, I remember.

Whatever that fear of man is, kick it to the curb. We are all disasters, we just mess up differently. If you worry what others think, that’s a surrender issue. My passion is to encourage my readers they can find freedom when they let that issue go. Like I said, my freedom comes from my faith. On my own strength I would be that author tied to Amazon’s rankings (I know authors who check hourly every single day) and honestly? That doesn’t sound fun.

Speaking of fun, I hope you enjoyed this first post. What you read is pretty much who I am and what I plan to write about. Now, go find some peanut M&M’s and think about any fears you might need to let go of. I look forward to “seeing” you soon.